You are looking into other possibilities with your life. You feel like you can't grow anymore from where you are. Furthering your education and learning new skills is high on your agenda. You've outgrown where you are, it's as simple as that.
You're caught between the excitement of something new to the other end of being terrified of the changes. You catch yourself fantasizing about various ways it can go and so it helps you to stay where you are.
But, that doesn't stay with you either. The feeling dissipates quickly and your logic mind kicks in again.
Don't fret about it. This is part of the process that change implements. It's helping you be ready for the bigger changes; coming soon.
Right now you're just feeling into it. It's difficult letting go of life as you know it in the hopes that what is to come could possibly exceed the joys you've known. But it will.
Not that it will exceed in joy but rather it will be felt in its own honor and time. It's joy, but a different kind of joy.
Sign up for those courses, put some money away toward your future and be brave. It'll take some time to adjust but in time you'll see that doing the planning first saves you a lot down the road. It feels like a distraction and that's exactly what it is. But it's for your benefit and your Now to come.
May this day serve you well. There is no other time.
Love and blessings, Dallas